Splash Mountain is the best ride that I hate to go on. You know how there are a lot of water rides where you get a little bit wet. This is absolutely not one of those rides. On Splash Mountain, you get WET. I hate walking around in wet clothes, so I only go on this ride if it's really, really hot outside.
Aside from the getting wet part, the ride is actually awesome. First off, it's long. Secondly, it has a lot of cute animated characters and tells a fun story, the story of Br'er Rabbit who is quite the trickster. Thirdly, the music is great and you'll be singing it the rest of the day (even after you go on "It's A Small World"). And FINALLY, the roller coaster aspect of the ride is amazing. It's one of the better roller coasters in all of the parks!
So, there's a lot of good going on at Splash Mountain. But often, you see the little cars riding around like this:
That's because of the wetness factor. As I said, you get splashed a few times throughout the ride. They kind of space it out, so you get a big splash, then a lot of ride, then another splash, then more ride. Then the final splash comes at the end and there's even MORE RIDE! In the end, you will be wet, but will have some time to dry off so you don't have to walk around with your wet shorts showing off your princess underwears for too long.
If it's warm out, you dry off pretty quickly, but in the cold, that wetness stings! Please, don't be one of those assholes who gets the poncho and wears it on the ride so they don't get wet at all. If you are going on Splash Mountain then own it, suck it up and get wet.
This is a tough ride to rate. If it's hot outside, 5/5 or 10/10 stars. I actually think this is one of the best rides in the whole Magic Kingdom. However, if it's cold, or even lukewarm, outside then 3/5 or 6/10 stars. Not even the best aspects of the ride can overcome how much it sucks to walk around in your cold, wet drawers.