Thursday, February 24, 2011

To Do in Spring

I am at it again and getting very excited for things to come in the Springtime. The King Tut exhibit has just opened and will remain open through early September and this includes the Omnitheater movie "Mummies", George Washington is on display at the History Center through the end of May and the Titian Golden Age of Painting exhibition is still at the Minneapolis Institute of Arts. Now we can add the following to our list:

  • Earthscapes Minigolf at the Science Museum, opens 5/28/2011. I love mini-golf courses and this one is educational as well.
  • Underwear: A Brief History, opens 5/7/2011 at the Minnesota History Center. This is a display of different kinds of underwear. This will be awesome. Plus, word to the wise, Tuesday nights you can get into the History Center FOR FREE from 5-8 P.M.
  • Sea Salt opens on 4/1/2011 at Minnehaha Park. If you haven't ever been, it's really a must. But, be prepared because there is always a line.
  • St. Patrick's Day celebration. St. Patrick's Day isn't totally my thing (which should be blasphemy because I come from a very Irish St. Paul family), but Mike loves it. There is a ton to do as many bars in St. Paul have events. Plus the big parade in downtown St. Paul is kind of a must see at least once in your life. Hopefully the weather will be good for it!
  • Lake/River walks. We ain't the Land of 10,000 Lakes for nothing. Walking around the lakes is good exercise and also totally awesome people and dog-watching. I prefer the less crowded Lake Nokomis, but nothing beats Lake Calhoun for the people watching. Also, River walks are also fun. There's a couple of good paths following the Mississippi that I love.
  • Happy Hours on the patio. Every year I forget how much I actually hate eating outside and talk about how excited I am that patios will be opening again. Maybe I truly love wind blowing napkins off tables and flies landing in my food more than I thought.
  • There are a few movies coming out, but like last year, nothing that I'm super excited about in the Spring. What is wrong with Hollywood lately?
  • Jersey Boys is coming to the Orpheum Theatre from 4/21/11-5/8/11.
  • Here's a couple of notable things that I probably won't do this spring, but though I'd mention: Riverdance from 3/18-3/20 at the State Theatre and Amos Lee on 3/24 at the State Theatre.
  • I TOTALLY forgot to add the ROYAL WEDDING! 4/29/11...also, Grace's birthday is that day.

There's my list. Come on Springtime! Add any additional things in the comments section.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

February Sucks

One day that dog will be in that pool again. It will not be for awhile, though.

This weekend, February wronged us all. It opened up a fury of venom, hate and spittle that was curiously disguised in peaceful, soft, white droppings. Last week I was enjoying sun and non-freezing temperatures and watching as the snow receded to a point where I could once again see grass. Then on Sunday, all of that progress was done away with. We are back where we started.

I bet Punxsutawney Phil is laughing his hairy little ass off right now.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

The Great Movie Ride

When MGM Studios (now Hollywood Studios) first opened at WDW, this replica of Mann's Chinese Theatre was the centerpiece of the park. Maybe 10 years or so ago, the powers-that-be put a giant Mickey's Sorcerer Hat in front of it and now that's the centerpiece. I think it's bullocks. This will always be the true centerpiece to me. Can you tell I don't like change.

One important note is to be cautious on the sidewalk just outside the theatre. They've made it sort of like the Hollywood Walk of Fame and have all of these hand prints in the cement. One time when I was much younger, I had just gotten in the park and was filled with enthusiasm and competitiveness. I wanted to be the first in line! So, I started running towards the entrance. Unfortunately, my grandma ran too and she totally bit it on one of the hand prints. Luckily, she suffered no scrapes or bruises. She's Hungarian, so she's tough like that.

Inside this beautiful centerpiece is a fun little ride. The Great Movie Ride. There are many awesome things about this ride. First is that the line typically goes pretty quickly. Hollywood Studios is actually a tricky place to plan your day out. There are so many shows to go and see and obviously those have set times. So, the best thing to do on a trip to Hollywood Studios is first determine what shows you want to go to and then you can fit rides in along the way. Anyhow, for this one the ride is usually reasonable.

Another great thing about the ride is that it's long and you are sitting the entire time. It gives your dogs a break. It also has a lot of nostalgia, which always gets me. You see actual recreated scenes from popular movies. Then you get to a point where there is live action in the form of gunfire. The ride has it's own little movie going on right inside of it.

Once you know the gag, it's not as fun, but the ride still has a lot to offer. At the end there is also a video montage of tons of great movies. It always leaves me feeling like I have a lot of classic movies that I need to be watching.

I give this ride a 5/5 or 9/10 stars.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Social Media Killed the Dating Star, Part Two

So, texting isn't really social media (or is it?), but I'm lumping it in the same category because it's a technological advancement that keeps us more connected than we ever really wanted to be. Folks, texting has totally changed dating. And I don't really think it's for the better.

A few years back, I was at Brit's Pub with a friend for happy hour. It was a Thursday night in the summer. The patio was packed with young working downtowners. My friend struck up a conversation with a dude in a suit. He was cute and charming and witty. In the end, they exchanged numbers. Awesome. A few days later it was the weekend and I was with this friend at another friend's house for a fun and girly wine party. The wine was from a wine cube, so it was super classy. Anyhow, around 9:00 P.M. the dude in a suit texts my friend. Now, they have had no communication between the first meeting and this party, but the guy texts her "How's your Saturday night going?" How random is that?

I know what you are thinking: Booty text. Maybe it was, but my friend wasn't playing it that way. I think the texting banter went back and forth for a week or more, but the guy never asked her to do anything. He just kept texting her. That's creepy.

I think basic rule of texting is this, if you don't know the person at least a tiny bit, if all you have is their cell phone number, then you should probably never resort to texting. If you are interested call and ask if they want to meet for drinks. If not, don't text. Creepbag.

A second story about texting shows the emotional turmoil it can put people through when starting a relationship. I know the agony of making phone calls when you first begin dating someone, it's terrifying and nerve wracking. Texting seems like a much easier option. However, I actually think texting is more difficult. First, there's the pressure to be witty. When you are writing something you can't just write it straight, you want to be seen as funny and clever and carefree. It's difficult pulling all of that off in a short sentence or two. Secondly, there's the agony of waiting. When you text someone, it's always assumed that they received the text immediately and can write you back immediately. But, that's not always the case. They might be busy, they might be unable to get service, they might not be able to take the time to write something back, they might be agonizing over how to sound clever as well. In the meantime, for the sender, every second is torture. Is the person not interested? Do they hate me? Did they think that my text wasn't clever enough? It really is the dumbest distress you can put yourself through.

Why am I ranting about texting? Because I think it's changed dating and I think we are the worse for it. As I said in Part One...actually talking and communicating is a natural part of building a relationship. You don't get the same thing out of a text.

Monday, February 14, 2011


This was the first of my free Kindle books. I have found that you can get most of the classics for free. I loved Pride & Prejudice, so I thought, why not. It was a mistake.

Perhaps, I wasn't in the mood for Jane Austen. Or perhaps I wasn't in the mood for a classic. Whatever it was, I really didn't like this. Through the beginning of the book, I was all "What's going on?" Through the middle I was all "Will this get better?" And at the end I was all "Who the eff cares?" It all just seemed so stupid to me.

Emma fancies herself a matchmaker, but she's bad at it and ruins a couple of people's lives in the process. Then there's this Mr. Knightley character who I thought was quite a bit older than Emma. But, then they fall in love. Sorry if I've ruined it for any of you. When the love part happened, I got a little bit sick to my stomach. I honestly thought he was her father's age, so I had this whole picture of him being old and her being really young. Then they were together and I got the creeps.

After wikipedia'ing that shit I found out that Knightley was actually only supposed to be around 37. Austen wrote him like he was 50 or 60.

Overall, this book was a pretty huge let down. 2/5 or 4/10 stars.

Friday, February 11, 2011

V Day is OR'd

I have lots of things swirling in ye old mind today, so this might be a multiple post day. Wouldn't that be awesome for my readers. All nine of you.

I am inspired by the upcoming holiday of Valentine's Day. I sort of love everything that VDay represents, but loathe what it's become. I like the idea of a day devoted to telling people that you love them and also to loving candy. I love candy hard. I also love the idea of a day where you can put up some fun decorations at your house that are red and pink and frilly and pretty. It sort of beats the dirty snow that's going on outside my window right now.

But, what is going on with these prix fixe dinners? I mean, really, can we talk about this? I looked up what would be my top choice restaurant for a fancy dinner to see what I would be served on VDay and I was pretty appalled. For $30/person I would get my choice of either butternut squash soup, a meat plate or a roasted beet salad to start, then my choice of either parsnip ravioli or braised beef short ribs for a main meal and then a choice of either banana bread pudding or caramel and rum chocolate ice cream. Wow, those choices are AWESOME! (Note intense sarcasm here).

It's not that the food sounds bad, it's just that there isn't an option. If you don't eat beef, then you're pretty screwed. Because I can only think of a couple of people who would be thrilled with parsnip ravioli.

And this isn't just what's going on at one restaurant, this is what restaurants across the country do. They limit your choices. And decrease the quantity of the food. Note to everyone else....the quality is also decreased. The food won't be as great because it will be rushed and you will also be rushed out the door because they need to fill your seat with another reservation. That's right, they overbook the restaurant. Ask anyone in the business and that's what they will tell you.

I don't know about you, but this doesn't sound too fun and romantic to me. It sounds sort of horrible.

Can't we just get the holiday back to what it's really about...loving candy? Also, while we are at it, can the candy industry please bring back the Cherry Jelly Hearts? The Cinnamon ones are not a substitute.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

World's Best Beer

This has been a long week. I am a limping unit right now due to a WebMD diagnosed case of tendinitis of the knee. I have a new appreciation for all people who limp. It takes a lot more work to do everything. Even getting into bed is a challenge when you can't bend your knee.

Anyhow, last Sunday brought us the game of all games...the Superbowl. In an effort to spice things up for the game, Mike wanted to go down to the Ale Jail in St. Paul to create our own six-pack of beer. I don't really like beer, although there are a few kinds that I will drink now and not totally gag at.

However, Sunday night changed my beer life. I found the above drink, which tasted like God himself was the brewmaster. It's brewed with bananas. Can you imagine such a crazy thing? I thought it would taste overly banana-y and thus not so great, but folks, that is soooo not the case. It's made with just the perfect hint of banana flavor. It's light and refreshing and kind of nutty. I love nutty things.

Pick one up today!

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Quote of the Day

Attorney: You will not participate in any activity that could cause harm to you or to others.
Client: No, I'm a Catholic.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Random Acts of Douchebaggery

I realized I didn't RAD anyone this last month!!! Horrors. I will pull this one out of the archives. This summer, I went on vacation for a week. It was awesome. But, I was all, what the eff do I do with my plants. Originally I thought I would bring them to my mom's, but it seemed like an awful lot of work to drive them over to her place, so I opted instead to bring them to Mike's house to have his roommate watch over them.

The three plants I brought were the three shown above. Basil, Datura & Rosemary. Only they were much bigger than they are in this picture. I brought them over to Mike's roommate and gave him strict instructions about their watering and general care. Actually, when I brought them over I said "Bjorn, I brought over three of my plants and put them on the back step..." He cut me off and said "Well, I hope they are still there when you get back." Then we all had a good laugh because he was totally joking with me. Except, turns out the joke was on us.

A day into our vacation, Mike got a call from Bjorn. They were just shooting the bull when Mike said "How are Molly's plants?" Bjorn then told him that the night before he put the plants on the front porch so they would get more sunlight and someone stole them overnight. STOLE THEM!!!!!!!!!!!

Who would steal plants? I mean honestly, who would do that??? Plus, it's not like Bjorn lives in a bad area, he lives in a family neighborhood. But, that's what happened. I spent the entire summer keeping these damn plants alive and someone stole them right from under me. I was especially annoyed about the Basil plant because I was hoping to have enough basil to make pesto at the end of the summer.

This one was pretty low. All I can say is I hope those bastards ate the Datura thinking it too was an herb plant.

Welcome February

Last night was Feb's Eve, my favorite holiday of the year. And I rang in the new month with gusto. Now that we are in a new month, I can make new resolutions and my resolution for this month is to finish at least two books. My reading has been really atrocious lately and I need to get back to it. My to-be-read list keeps growing longer and longer.

For the record, I did not finish The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest this weekend, but I am very close to finishing. I think I have maybe 75 pages or so left. So, hopefully this week I will finish it. BTW, I can't wait to skewer that thing.

What are everyone else's resolutions?