That's right...mice. The other day I was relaxing at home when I saw a mouse scamper out of my bedroom closet and under my bed. I screamed, twice. Then I saw another (or the same, who can tell) mouse run around in the closet. He didn't make it out because I screamed again and he ran back in. Of course they would have to infest the closet, out of every other room, that's where all of my investments are stored.
Since I never asked for a roommate, I went out and bought this unwanted houseguest a nice buffet of poisonous pills to dine on for the evening. I generously scattered the pills throughout my apartment and left my little squatter to dine in peace while I went out drinking.
I'm trying to think positive, but 2009 just doesn't seem like it's going to be my year.