Random Acts of Douchebaggery

I am a needy person.  I need a lot.  One of the things that I NEED is a cold diet coke at work.  It's essential.  The other day, we were out of Diet Coke at home (I usually bring my own can to work because it's so much cheaper than the vending machines...75 cents a can?!  Are you kidding me?!) and so I went to work without a can thinking I could get one from the vending machine at lunchtime. 

Around 11:45 A.M., I had a serious DC craving.  I needed the juice.  I went to the vending machine and found this huge soda stack in the hallway right outside the vending machine room.  I panicked and said a little prayer: "Please God, let there be Diet Coke in the machine.  I'll even take a Diet Coke with Lime."  My prayer went unanswered and no matter how many times I pushed the Diet Coke button, I got the same message "TRY AGAIN." 

I can't even tell you how many times I stood next to that stack of soda and wondered if I could just grab a can and leave the money next to the stack?  Would that be inappropriate? 

But, can we talk about the lazy ass vending machine guy?  Who would do this?  Who would leave an entire stack of soda right next to the vending machine for the whole day?  Plus, it was a Friday.  People need their caffeine on Fridays!  And why would you buy more Diet Coke Lime than Diet Coke?  That is so stupid.

The moral of this story is that, at 3:00 P.M., I had gone an entire day without soda and this stack of unvended soda cans almost brought me to tears.  The person who caused those tears is a total douche. 

On a side note, if the Diet Coke boxes were at the top of the stack, I totally would have grabbed one and left the money.